Well​-​Dressed / Well​-​Adjusted

from by UT Kirin

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junior spring


the new year rang in in New York
in a new bar, in an old part of the East Village
and the bartender could not stand to be in her place of work
when 2013 finished
there were student deaths in the air and all I could think of were their parents
there were university cultural despairs over fairness
and frankly I couldn't have cared less

I had never taken LSD then, and I know now, when you're in it you cannot swim
but he tried, and I could never imagine how beautiful the ocean must have looked to him

people like us, they think we're cute, and I do too
and when you're bothered I know it's the real you
people like you are well-dressed South Bay lighthouses that I crashed into
and now the numbers that had once given me comfort look like my enemy
but I've sunk too many pleasant life plans into this well-adjusted half of me

we never made it to South Padre, and now it seems we never will
in many ways the Texas Coast has always felt impossible
and there's a realization that I was mistaken to end it
cause you weren't as visibly shaken as I was
beside me at his candlelight service
and I was so god damn nervous
and you were crying but wordless

the final week that everyone was around
my wrists were open
my veins were open
and I bled colors all the way to Fort Worth
and back again
and I was grasping at something


from Wry Side of Paradise, released July 24, 2016



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