Live at Coffee House

by UT Kirin

/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.

      name your price

     

1.
03:09
2.
03:33
3.
03:53
4.
03:09
5.
6.
03:42
7.
8.
04:22
9.
10.
11.
05:17
12.

credits

released April 6, 2015

tags

license

all rights reserved

shows

contact / help

Contact UT Kirin

Streaming and
Download help

Track Name: Jennifer
Fill a void, this hollowed crevice has been haunting me
I’ve been mistaken far too many times to justify this very
Feeling of such self-assured elation and despondency
But run with me, I’ve got another headwind heading east across a sea
She sees a summer coming, rushing on a raging river
Everything’s in swing and she is ready to break all the tethers
But I’ve been making strings out of my heart and hoping that they’ll weather
And I’ve been making echos in the dark but they all come back shattered

So now I’m swallowed up, engulfs me and I can’t go back
Your eyes have told me truths that cut me sharper than the white and black
These mirror images reflect a trail that is long and wound
You’re waiting on the other end to tell me now that I’ve been found

I can show you all the colors you thought lied too far past
The ultraviolet spectrum’s meaningless when we are fast
Approaching all the things you thought you left behind when you were young
But now the clock is ticking so I’m asking if you if you will run and

Keep calm and carry on, I’ve tried but I can’t hide no more
This anxious feeling hits like an insomniac whose eyes are sore
And I’ve been told to keep it under wraps but I just can’t ignore
The sound of either St. Peter or Hades knocking at me door and
I’m writing math down in a notebook but I’m thinking
Of a girl who likes to write about the things she thinks are trifling
But I know that they mean more cause I can hear it when she’s singing
Write a life down in the key of C and send your mind of reeling

I can drive you to the places you have never been to
Drop your life behind and let the steering wheel guide you
If I’m a flame I’ve been rekindled and right now I’m burning blue
So now I’m asking if I might light a fire inside of you


So fill a void, this hollowed crevice has been haunting me
I’ve been mistaken far too many times to justify this very
Feeling of such self-assured elation and despondency
But run with me, I’ve got another headwind heading east across a sea
Track Name: Lion Tamer
Did you see the crowd today, it was giant
They’re waiting outside for him now
Coulda filled a house today without trying
Tell them he’s coming right out
Did you see the way he whipped him today
His eyes were Medusa, that lion was grey
And I guess that’s all that there is to say
Now where’s he gone off to, these people won’t stay

And somewhere that lion tamer
He knows there’s no fear greater
Than telling the world that lion’s declawed
Than telling the world that they’ve got it all wrong
Than knowing his life would be riddled with shame
Than being a beast that’s trapped in a cage

Get some sleep, we’ve got a show in the morning
Tell me is your back okay
I know I got you with the stool without warning
I shouldn’t have got in your way
When you roar at me, I know it’s not you
They give you poison and deprive you of food
So that you’ll do just what they want you to do
I swear, I promise, I’ll get you out soon

And somewhere that lion tamer
He knows there’s no fear greater
Than telling the world that lion’s declawed
Than telling the world that they’ve got it all wrong
Than knowing his life would be riddled with shame
Than being a beast that’s trapped in a cage

I want to open the cages
I want to let you go raging on
And bite off the hand that forced you this life
And bite of the hand that fed you the knife
But all I know is how to go on
Being afraid and praying that I’m wrong
Track Name: Sophomores
All the sophomores are abustle, the autumn wind knows no one’s company today
A piece of Northface fights the fray while all the DJs start to play
And I would hustle if that set is due at eight
A red river lines the trail, your run is littered by a pack of little leaves
And while you wait you have to plead yourself to not go home with reasons how
You sailed through another month with B’s

I’ve been carving pictures
Spitting out the seeds in lectures
Keeping time with all your problems
Wishing that you’d fucking solve them
Skip the weekend go to Boston
Missing out on Friday’s frolic seems
Like a good trade to me but you don’t agree and

There’s a line that runs out this door to all the
Opportunities and broken-spirit-makers
You’re a casualty of what’s become expected
Four years of fucking up, let’s drink until we’re reckless

There’s that girl you’re always seeing, she looks so shy in this dimly lit facade
But it’s so loud you wander till she’s gone, just traces left of goldenrod
It’s freeing but depressing all along
And all your friends have got their shit shows, the only remedy’s a dusty stack of books
But while you’re buried in those scenic hooks, you’ll just about avoid the looks
From all the chances that you never took

Dress the room up nicely
Have all the drinks been put on ice yet
A crawl was stopping through on seventh
I was thinking maybe Neon Indian
To a night we won’t remember
So why does this seem so familiar now
A thousand times before so what’s one more

There’s a line that runs out this door to all the
Opportunities and broken-spirit-makers
You’re a casualty of what’s become expected
Four years of fucking up, let’s drink until we’re reckless

There’s a line that runs out this door to all the
Opportunities and broken-spirit-makers
You’re a casualty of what’s become expected
Four years of fucking up, let’s drink until we’re reckless

It’s been far too long, we really need to talk
When we were so naive, she thought we both were so cool
I remember once when I was so much younger
This all seemed so enchanting, what’s happened to my hunger

There’s a line that runs out this door to all the
Opportunities and broken-spirit-makers
I’m a casualty of what’s become expected
Four years of fucking up, let’s drink until we’re reckless
Track Name: Werewolf
There’s better things to do than lie here for hours
And talk about nothing, and open the windows
And sit on the roof making faces at strangers
And hoping you’ll leave before I have to make you
I’m writing a novel, I’m writing a story
You talk about things that you think are important
You think that your shit sounds so heavy, but really
You make it that way so that you have a reason

To tell me, when I ask you why are you so scared
And why do you care so much
There’s nothing between us, there’s no depth to climb from I’m hoping you’ll see
There’s not battle beneath us, but I can’t kick my appetite, kicking myself again

Shooting down bad rum and feeling a nice vibe
It’s almost enough to fool myself into
Telling you that you’re a good one and taking you
All of the places I know won’t be good for you
Tell me one more of your secrets, please
I’m the only one who understands everything
And yes, of course I have told you all of my
Deepest and darkest and shamelessly cried lies

I’ll never, I’ll never find someone
Good enough for my selfish expectations
Of some sweet young maiden, from far off, who knows what I mean when I say that nothing excites me
Who knows what I mean when I say that I’m empty

Go fuck the others they’ll be happy to see you
They know that you’re hurting, they think that I’m seething
They think I’m a werewolf, they think I’m a vampire
They think I’m a monster, I am, why is that wrong
Come back to the mountain, that’s where I’ll be waiting
I wish I was eighteen, I wish I was happy
I wish I was anything but what I told you
I wanted from life, all I want is
Track Name: Holland 1945 / Communist Daughter (Neutral Milk Hotel Cover)
The only girl I've ever loved
Was born with roses in her eyes
But then they buried her alive
One evening 1945
With just her sister at her side
And only weeks before the guns
All came and rained on everyone
Now she's a little boy in Spain
Playing pianos filled with flames
On empty rings around the sun
All sing to say my dream has come

But now we must pick up every piece
Of the life we used to love
Just to keep ourselves
At least enough to carry on

And now we ride the circus wheel
With your dark brother wrapped in white
Says it was good to be alive
But now he rides a comet's flame
And won't be coming back again
The Earth looks better from a star
That's right above from where you are
He didn't mean to make you cry
With sparks that ring and bullets fly
On empty rings around your heart
The world just screams and falls apart

But now we must pick up every piece
Of the life we used to love
Just to keep ourselves
At least enough to carry on

And here's where your mother sleeps
And here is the room where your brothers were born
Indentations in the sheets
Where their bodies once moved but don't move anymore
And it's so sad to see the world agree
That they'd rather see their faces fill with flies
All when I'd want to keep white roses in their eyes

Sweet communist, the communist daughter
Standing on the sea-weed water
Semen stains the mountaintops
Semen stains the mountaintops

With coca leaves along the border
Sweetness swings from every corner
Cars careening from the clouds
The bridges burst and twist around

And wanting something warm and moving
Bend towards herself, the soothing
Proves that she must still exist
She moves herself about her fist

Sweet communist, the communist daughter
Standing on the sea-weed water
Semen stains the mountaintops
Semen stains the mountaintops
Track Name: When We Left
She said I’ve got an idea
Lets go into the city
Lets go do some acid let’s see what might happen
And she’s making it real the words on the page
The words that I wrote down, the words that she loved
That she loved

She doesn’t like cider
She doesn’t like coffee
She only likes smoking and making me think that
She wants me she doesn’t
Come on kid stop putting
Her name in your songs and her eyes in your memories

And she’s managed to find
A whole lot of acceptance
Fom thinking she’ll always have daydreams while miming
Correctness it’s breaking
Her patience is fraying
She hates all the rules and others she hates them she hates them

And I’ve got an idea
I’m gonna fill the space of our memories
With new ones
Because I can’t bear to think about them
As I become certain that no one I meet will be you

But I’ve got people I lie to
And tell them I love them
While hoping their face becomes yours in the nighttime
And sometimes I can’t quite
Remember your voice
Or your smile or your laugh or the way that you stared

Out the window while thinking
With something so gripping
A moment I’d hold if I could without feeling
And slipping and now
I’m a senior I’m cracking
I’m old and I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it

But she used to like driving
And picking the playlist
And asking where were we and how long
Until when we’ve made it
Unaided by drugs just the fear
Of growing right into the ground we were raised in

And I’d stay in my head
And you’d slay the silence
But that was alright cause we both knew that words couldn’t
Hide us from fleeing
Or journeys depending
On how brave we felt when we left when we left but I still don’t know when we left
Track Name: American Spirit
She holds a cigarette because she likes the way it makes her look
When landscape’s steaming by and windows paint a picture like a book
Cause only books can take her romping through the wilderness
At ninety miles an hour where the torrent wind is torrid bliss

She wants to get away from all the pleasant novelties
And old cliche activities and chic suburban frivolties
But there was no escape and so she swallowed all her sorrows
And now we’re climbing mountains taking pictures of tomorrow

And when the Earth turns you smile
While I was thinking of gravity
And how I wish I could float away
To where the sunrise is always seen
And dislocate from this pleasant place
Cause it has been such a while
And if the Earth turns away from me
Well that would be ok

I’ve seen the mountaintops all nestled up like Russian dolls
You open them up one by one but all you find are empty halls
And shadows of the people who once walk them in your memory
Now they’ve all gone away but still chant a ghostly melody

Kick back the stirrups and go riding till you find the spot
Where pieces of your life are picking up and turning back the clock
Now hold them in your heart until your logic takes them all away
Now hold them in your mind until that logic disappears one day

And when the Earth turns you smile
While I was thinking of gravity
And how I wish I could float away
To where the sunrise is always seen
And dislocate from this pleasant place
Cause it has been such a while
And if the Earth turns away from me
Well that would be ok
Track Name: Listmaker
You’ve been here two times before
How does it feel not to cry
When someone’s screaming next door
Acting like they want to die
You keep two pictures of your exes on the windowsill in frames
You keep their hats and shirts and wear them like they’re yours all the same

You line your notebooks with lists
Like there’s no care in the world
Which Andrew Bird song is best
Which college has cutest girls
If honesty is feigned but never known then you’re honest Abe
Another beer, another spliff, another mark on your grave

I belong with wolves who
Howl at night and rip up all the
Skin and guts of innocent snow walkers leaving tracks in their path
I want to lap up the blood
And when I do so I laugh

They so I’m much too west coast
I say I’m no more than most
I’d rather revel with ghosts
And spill my wine when i toast
Come back you’re killing yourself you’re lousy at the games that we play
I play for fun, I’ve never won, I never will, that’s okay

Keep ticking, thats my advice
If you want help with your life
The way that you fight with knives
You’re right i never knew plight
You’re money’s all been spent there’s only time to recollect
And re-collect the bills that went toward flashy thoughts you never meant

I belong with wolves who
Howl at night and rip up all the
Skin and guts of innocent snow walkers leaving tracks in their path
I want to lap up the blood
And when I do so I laugh

I’m all alone and that’s alright
I’m all alone and that’s alright
I’m all alone that’s what I like
I’m all alone and that’s alright
I’m all alone and that’s alright
I’m all alone in my life
I’m all alone that’s what I like
I’m all alone and that’s alright
I’m all alone that’s what I like
I’m all alone and that’s alright
I’m all alone and that’s alright
I’m all alone and that’s alright!
Track Name: Swan Dive (Waxahatchee Cover)
I cling to indifference, you to your worst memory
dark winter morning you honk your car horn at me
and I will grow out of all the empty bottles in my closet
and you'll quit having dreams about a swan dive to the hard asphalt
ooh, ooh...

won't you sleep with me every night for a week
won't you just let me pretend this is the love I need
and I will grow out of all the empty words I often speak
and you will be depleted, but much better off without me
ooh, ooh...

you hold on to the past, you make yourself miserable
and I'm ruled by seasons and sadness that's inexplicable
and we will find a way to be lonely any chance we get
and I'll keep having dreams about loveless marriage and regret
ooh, ooh...
Track Name: Source Decay (Mountain Goats Cover)
Once a week I make the drive, two hours east
To check the Austin post office box
And I make the detour through our old neighborhood
See all the Chevy Impalas in their front yards up on blocks

And I park in an alley
And I read through the postcards you continue to send
Where as indirectly as you can, you ask what I remember
I like these torture devices from my old best friend

Well, I'll tell you what I know, like I swore I always would
I don't think it's gonna do you any good
I remember the train headed south out of Bangkok
Down toward the water

I always get a late start when the sun's going down
And the traffic's thinning out and the glare is hard to take
I wish the West Texas Highway was a mobius strip
I could ride it out forever

When I feel my heart break, I almost swear I hear it happen, in fact, clean and not hard
I come in off the highway and I park in my front yard
Fall out of the car like a hostage from a plane
Think of you a while, start wishing it would rain

And I remember the train headed south out of Bangkok
Down toward the water

I come into the house, put on a pot of coffee
Walk the floors a little while
I set your postcard on the table with all the others like it
I start sorting through the pile

I check the pictures and the postmarks and the captions and the stamps
For signs of any pattern at all
When I come up empty-handed the feeling almost overwhelms me
I let a few of my defenses fall

And I smile a bitter smile
It's not a pretty thing to see
I think about a railroad platform
Back in 1983

And I remember the train headed south out of Bangkok
Down, down toward the water
Track Name: Horse Killer
She took me down in the middle of the day to this old sunken pool hall where we used to play
And I told her I like her eyes while she emptied a Collins and played with her braid
She said she’d like to climb up a tree and have a look down at all of the scavenging fleas
Who would put on their suits and hurry miserably while their poor lonely housewives would drown in sake

Keep em’ killer, don’t be sorry to miss me
I was writer, while you were reading a mystery
At ten to noon I was patiently knocking, but you censored the shutter and you left me to rot
So I got on the train and I rode to the stop where you seemingly ceased to belong in my locket
You had been drinking so I took you back home, but you asked me to stay and you said that you won’t
Feel the same way tomorrow, so leave and it’s over, but how could I know what you’d think when you’re sober

Pitch me love, pitch me pictures of happiness
Send me to run, then bring me back with your carelessness

I’m just a horse, running loose in your wilderness
You are the desert, you promise nothing but emptiness

And it’s a long way back if you think you can walk it
I’m sick of this trail, so sick of the dark
But there’s a fork splitting the most discrete difference
And oddly enough I don’t care if I miss it
And if I find you in pieces again
Getting torched on your fire and throwing a fit
Then I will take you back home all over again
And we’d start this all up from the top, now where do we begin

And it’s a long way back if you think you can walk it
I’m sick of this trail, so god damn sick of the dark
But there’s a fork splitting the most discrete difference
And oddly enough I don’t care if I miss it
And if I find you in pieces again
Getting torched on your fire and throwing a fit
Then I will take you back home all over again
And we’d start this all up from the top, now where do we begin
Track Name: I Am An Animal
Put your guns away, you’ve shot them off two times today
She said meet me at the cabin, then ran away to Montana

Go get your guitar, it’s in the closet upstairs
The one by the fireplace where we used to sit, alright I’ll get it

And when the moon gets high, we’ll make a run for water
Count the footprints that you leave behind and look at me with wild eyes

I am not a boy
I am an animal
I am a spirit of night
I don’t want to see light
I am not a boy
I am an animal
I am a spirit of night
I don’t want to see light

Take your clothes off and settle down
Put that record on that makes me think of freshman year and
Pull your hair to one side and cock your hips to the other side
And let me see the candle dancing in your deep brown iris
There are fireworks outside lighting up the night sky
There’s a blanket of stars, covered in black and draped over the hillside
And did you mean to spill your wine because you know I like
To see you just a little drunk and screaming your sins at the darkness

So ramp the car to ninety and run the gas till empty
And put that station on that plays the songs that we can sing to
There’s an open clearing but fireflies are fleeing
Must be monsters roaming, getting older, eating dreams and
Don’t turn around you’ll see it, don’t close your eyes I need them
Hits you when you least expect it, nineteen seemed so very reckless
Twenty-seven takes you out while twenty-nine chases me down
I do not think that this is how that old age was supposed to catch me

I am not a boy
I am an animal
I am a spirit of night
I don’t want to see light
I was not a boy
I was an animal
I was a spirit of night
I don’t want to see light